Lizards.

Yup, the title for this blog post is "Lizards". It may sounds disgusting or maybe you guys think that it is my current favorite animal to be as my pet; well you are wrong. Never, in a million years I would want reptiles or amphibians to be as a pet. Just, NOPE.

If you really know me, which I think only my family knows about this since I live with them for almost twenty six years now, the one and only animal I loathe the most is, yes, lizards. I can stand cockroaches, spiders or any bugs you name it (well, except for flies and mosquitoes because they are so annoying), but not lizards. I am talking about common "creatures" where you could find in your very own four walls.

I do not know why or how or what on Earth that my life has to be encountered or bumped into with lizards. I will list it down below on the worst case scenarios (ever!) of me vs lizards. T_T"

IN PUBLIC PLACES

I was with a friend of mine at one of my usual hangout places; Rasta TTDI. For those who doesn't know Rasta, it is like a foodcourt, a huge one, you can choose either you want to have your meal under the roof, which is like twenty to twenty five feet tall (yes, very high ceiling) or you may want to sit at the center of the foodcourt seatings which is outdoor. And I chose to sit in-between the outdoor one and under the high-ceiling roof.

The waiter came with a menu and I just felt like there is something on top of my head, it is not a dust obviously because it has weight in it. So I asked my friend while he was busy studying the menu, "Hey, umm, what's... on... my... head?" as I cover my forehead with both of my hands. The waiter heard my question and he stand back with a pen and paper cover his mouth. My friend replies with, "Sit still, very still. It is... uh... a... lizard." I went "AHHHHHHHHH!" while brushing the lizard off my head with my hands and everybody was staring at me. The lizard fell on the ground and ran away before I decided to step on it or something. So yeah. That was so embarrassing that people had to see that. Of course my face has turned red for a decade and I wanted to leave but my friend wanted to have a meal there so I had to focus on getting my skin colour back for like, forever.

AT SCHOOL

I was walking to class, I think it was my evening class and I barely see people in my faculty. It was dark and I walked alone and I almost reached the door to my lab class. As I was about to open the door, there is a "plop" sound, like something fell on my MacBook that I was holding onto my chest because I can feel the vibration of something fell on my laptop. I looked down to my MacBook, trying to process what I was seeing at that time since it was very dark. My laptop was silver in colour and there is like a black figure lying on it, I thought it was a shadow but it turned out to be a lizard. It was not fun at all especially when you are half way of opening the damn door. I kept calm, removed the lizard by throwing it and shaking the MacBook and entered the class, gracefully.

AT HOME

I don't know about you but I think everybody has encountered with lizards at home once or twice, right? Am I right or am I right? LOL! Well, let's see. My loathness towards lizards has becoming stronger each and every day that I must spray the lizard repellent at least once a week around my house and also the gazebo at my backyard just to ensure that those lizards won't come back and make a scene.

But unfortunately they have backups everywhere, so I still have to be cautious no matter how cozy I get when I'm home. It happened last week, oh wait, I had to deal with them twice last week! First one, I was happily watering my plant in my backyard and suddenly, yup, a lizard fell on top of my head. Again. Why my head?! Is there some sort of lizard-code that you guys go with "when you see Malina's head, that is when you jump, that is our spot to land safely" kind of thing?! Again, of course I screamed and water my head as well to make the lizard go away. Oh and this is not the house-brown-lizard. This is like chameleon? But not the slow kind of chameleon, this is the one that can run at the surface of the water kind of thing? I think. Because it runs so fast, I can't even get the chance to chase after it. LOL!

The second one, I was happily sipping my evening tea at the gazebo with my family, and something fell on top of my upper lip. I went, "Eww, what the hell?!" and wiped my lips off for so many freaking times. It was, lizard's poo. Yup, my life sucks. You do not want to know how I dealt with that one. Move along.

Third one, happened yesterday. Ehem. I had to go out to pick up my mom from work in the evening. So as usual, I opened the main door to the car porch and got outside, and about to wear my flipflop and that is when the lizard planned on crossing the porch through my flipflop. Like, what the hell? Out of all places at home and out of all times, that is your perfect timing to go?! Luckily I do not step on the lizard as I was about to wear that damn flipflop because it was fast enough to run away but I still can feel the texture of that damn little thing. Eww.

There are many other encounters with lizards actually but I only have the time to write the top 5 so there you go. I think its either the lizards love me or loathe me too. Well, what I know is that, I loathe you even more. You are the most disgusting creature ever. Like seriously. Look at your little fingers. Err, I feel like throwing up. *green face sick emoji*

Malina A, x